It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I will pee on everything he values.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Randomize
