I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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