I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
The cops high fived after they tackled you
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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