no, he came in my armpit
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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