can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
