We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
