NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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