The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I think my moral compass just broke
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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