I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
