When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
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