On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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