only you would photoshop your dick
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
