I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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