We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I just saw a hot homeless man
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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