Dual....:-)
I'm jealous of your bromance
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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