At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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