No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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