Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
