so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Define "chronic" masturbator.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
