Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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