happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
