its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Randomize
