i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
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