i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Randomize
