nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
