Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Randomize
