Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
