Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
God, I missed his penis.
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