Dual....:-)
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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