just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
It's rum buckets o'clock
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
