Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Mom said you looked used
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
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