You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
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