Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize
