so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
