I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
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