there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
