He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Randomize
