Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Randomize
