We're facebook friends in real life
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
