honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
