It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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