your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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