Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
