really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
