No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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