Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
