Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
