is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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