We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Even the bartender felt bad for me
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
