he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
